I'm Struggling

I am a fighter, a survivor, always have been. I was raised to be a fixer, a mediator, a peacemaker, and a peacekeeper.  But lately, the truth is that I'm struggling. The constant struggle of health issues have been taking a toll. I go into fix it mode and say things like "If I have a plan, I have hope." Yet... I am tired. I am weary. I need a nap!  But, I need more than that. I need healing, in more ways than one. Friend, can you relate?

I was talking to a couple friends the other day and the conversation turned to the stresses of life and the toll it takes on our health. We kind of laughed about it at first. You know how it is, it is awkward to admit when we are struggling, so we laugh and say how we can relate, then share a funny story about how we forgot something and looked silly to another, etc. We quickly realized though that we are not alone in our struggles. Stress is toxic to our well-being, we all know this, we can feel it sucking the life out of us like a slow leak in a balloon. We talked about how it deteriorates not just our physical health, but also our mental health. It can be quite scary, and honestly, feel quite isolating. It's no joke!

With social, political, and economic tensions, a global pandemic, war, and countless other things adding to our existing stress loads of family drama, everyone taking offense to every single thing, health concerns... it seems we don't know what to say, think, or feel anymore. We struggle to fit in, then we don't even want to. IT IS ALL TOO MUCH!

Friends, Satan wants to stir up strife and isolate us  from one another. He wants to make us feel as if we have nothing to offer. He wants us to take offense with each other and hold onto the hurt. We are all tired. We are all weary. We are all overwhelmed. And, all too often, we are looking for relief in all the wrong places. We feel like no one will understand what we are going through. After all, it often seems that whenever we do try to talk to someone, it stirs up an argument and we just don't have the energy for that roller coaster again. ... Does any of this resonate with you? Can you relate?

I have Jesus, whom I depend on, he is my constant help and comfort, my provider. Yet, we were not designed to live life in isolation, we were meant for community and fellowship, to support and encourage one another. We all need people in our lives to cheer us on, to remind us that WE ALL HAVE VALUE. Our life experiences equip us differently.  We are all different, yet we all hurt and feel and bleed the same. Never feel you cannot speak up and ask for help when you are struggling. You will find that you are not as alone as you think you are.

Recently, I was struggling and feeling like my friends were all so busy with their own lives that they just didn't have time for me anymore, that I didn't have anything to offer them. Thinking that perhaps God had only brought them into my life for a season, I decided I was only going to reach out one last time and if they didn't make an effort, I would not reach out again. While it is true that for one friend, it turned out to be a 'seasonal friendship', the other friend and I met for dinner. I learned during that conversation that even though this dear friend has a family and seems to have it all together, she was struggling with depression and was thinking she really didn't want to live anymore. I was shocked! How could this beautiful human being with so much to offer feel that way?! When I was thinking I had nothing to offer and no one wanted to hear from me, this amazing woman was feeling weary and isolated, like she had nothing left to offer. ... So. Was. I.

I often say things like "Fake it till you feel it", "You can choose to be a survivor or a victim", "You can be pitiful, or you can be powerful, but you can't be both"... and most of the time, that pep talk works for me. But if I'm honest, it doesn't always. Sometimes I need someone to know when something is off and come along side me and cheer me on. I need people in my life to encourage me and remind me that I have worth. Because I do, and SO DO YOU!

Life is hard! Don't be afraid to speak up, stay connected even when you don't feel like it, get help when you need it. You have value. You are loved. You are needed. Reach out to a friend or a family member. Reach out to me. Just reach out and find a hand, find help, find hope. 💞🙏🙏🙏💞

National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
1-800-273-TALK
Text HOME to 741 741

Friends, let's be the friend or the family member who pushes through and reaches out. Let's be the encouragement and cheer leader for another today. Our God, the creator of the universe, created beauty all around us, and that includes you and me. I love you, even if I don't yet know you, and I truly wish you a LIFE OF LOVE.
Debby 😘